Grandma

I have debated as to whether I should share this information on here or not but here it is 3:30 in the morning and I can not sleep. Maybe it will help if I share how heavy my heart is at this time.

Yesterday I was reminded how fast life can change on us. One minute you are going through your regular daily routine and the next tragedy stikes. Sometime thursday night or friday morning Pete's grandmother had a brain bleed and slipped into a coma. Pete went to check on her after school yesterday and found that she had not been out to get the paper which is something she does everyday. When he tried to get in the house it was still barred which meant grandma hadn't been up yet. He knew something was wrong as it was about 12:30 or 1:00 when he showed up. He had to break into her house and he found her still in bed unresponsive. He called 911 and she was rushed to the hospital. I was fortunate to have a very dear church memeber show up at my house at the same time I was on the phone with Pete and she took my children for me so that I could go with Pete to the hospital. (Thank you Peggy for being there when I needed you.) The bleed likely happened while Grandma was a sleep. At her age and given her medical history and the location of the bleed surgery really just was not an option. The bleed is located inside her brain near her brain stem and likely occured because she was on cumidan (spell?) a blood thinner. The doctors said her blood got too thin which allowed it to bleed into her brain. As I type this Pete is sitting at the hospital with her so that she is not alone. Presently she is in a coma and breathing on her own and as the bleed continues those functions will slowly deteriate. They tell us it could be a matter of hours or days before she passes on and they will do all they can to insure that she is comfortable. We are hoping she makes it long enough for Pete's Dad and Uncle to make it here.

I know that we both had offered to help people and do things yesterday we were unable to get to and I hope that you will forgives us for not being there or full filling our obligations. Grandma is such an integral part to our life and I am having a hard time realizing that she is not with us any longer. I miss her dearly and don't yet feel ready to say goodbye. She wanted Gabby to take dance class and offered to pay for her to do so. I just got Gabby signed up on thursday and her first class is on Tuesday. I was going to bring grandma along so she could see her dance. I really wanted her to see her dance.

I haven't told Gabby yet what has happened. I have no idea how to tell a 3yr old she will never see her grandma great anymore. She wants to visit her on nearly a daily basis and it brings me to tears to realize I will have to tell her she can no longer see grandma. I understand death and that she would have wanted to go this way. I understand that it's natural and apart of life and sad yes but not the end. I just don't know how to help my three year old understand. She loves her grandma great as much as she loves her parents.

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we go through this tragedy.